Me and My Politically-charged Questions

In case you haven't noticed, I don't like the idea of people getting on a soapbox, be it a cardboard soapbox or internet soapbox (or a soapbox actually made out of soap, for that matter), and speaking their mind on politics as if they know everything and those who are in opposition to them know nothing. Currently, this is the basis for political discourse in our country. If you watch or listen to any political program today, the scenario is almost always the same: two or more individuals who fall on opposite sides of a conflict are brought on to discuss said conflict; each side proceeds to blindly argue his/her point; the volume of the speakers' voices gradually builds; the person who is yelling the loudest by the end of the show wins the debate. The Presidential "Debates" are the worst example of our problem with political discourse. In the Presidential Debates, they actually have rules stating that the candidates are not allowed to look at each other let alone interact with each other. Very little is actually debated in our country because people essentially say, "This is what I believe, and no matter how much sense your argument makes I won't change my point of view." This was Jon Stewart's basic point when he argued with Tucker Carlson and Paul Begala on CNN's "Crossfire." "Crossfire" is a show that basically brags about being ignorant, as they guarantee with every episode that they will find a way to take an issue and spin it to support both Republican and Democratic opinions. How does this help resolve the issue? I personally prefer to engage people with whom I disagree by asking them questions about why they feel a particular way about something (not in a Middle School gay guidance counselor sort of way but rather in a fundamental political belief sort of way). Believe it or not, this long explanation is just a build-up for what I originally wanted to talk about.

So, let me start by saying that I support someone's right to bear the Confederate flag. In my opinion, you can disagree with what the flag stands for (i.e., I support the right to do the action, not the action itself), but as long as you can prove that the bearer isn't using the flag to intimidate others, then you have to respect their freedom of speech.

However, I do have a question for those who bear the Confederate flag: why? Why bear the flag? I understand that there is this notion of pride; in the sense that you are proud of the time that your territory rebelled and almost succeeded in gaining its independence from the United States of America. Yet, how can you symbolize this event on one hand, while saying that you are "proud to be an American" on the other hand? I guess I feel that this is contradictory because the Civil War was a time when the south tried to leave the union known as America. If a territory in the United States today were to suddenly decide that it wished to secede from the nation, would we not declare the people of this particular territory to be completely unpatriotic? In my opinion, the Confederate flag represents the ultimate example of shame in being an American. Someone please help me understand.